Black Feminism and The Black Men’s Rights Movement

. 08/18/2010 . 22 Comments

Sagging Pants, Lagging Men

The guest went on to add that he felt it was the responsibility of Black women to tell young Black men to pull their pants up and stop sagging. He wanted to know why women aren’t complaining about or alarmed by this trend.

First of all, his statement shows just how ignorant he is of how it feels to be vulnerable in our society… to be viewed by those in power as property, easily dispensable, use of our bodies available for the taking if a guy wants it. He has no concept of nor respect for how scared females feel around intimidating groups of angry men. I know no woman that would choose to confront a man about his attire and risk getting cussed out or physically assaulted by a surly, half high gang banger!

Seriously, half the men I know wouldn’t have the courage to give such a command to one of these not wrapped too tight knuckleheads!

This man, an alleged spokesperson for the Black male movement, continued his finger pointing and assault on Black women by charging that our communities have been destroyed “because of women’s acceptance of out-of-wedlock children.”

He pointed out that women used to be ashamed of becoming pregnant outside of marriage, and would run off to another state to have their child in secret. He expressed contempt for accommodations made by public school systems around the nation for pregnant teen mothers. The fact that the girls are educated on proper nutrition and child care as they also complete their academic curriculum to graduate high school and have a chance at a halfway decent life is irrelevant in his book.

Let’s also not forget the fact that it takes a sperm and an egg to create a fetus. Meaning that for every pregnant teen FEMALE, there was a teen or older male involved in getting her that way. For every ashamed and guilt-ridden pregnant FEMALE, there is a teen or older male that needs to be ashamed and guilt-ridden as well.

BUT WHERE ARE THOSE MEN? Why are they not stepping up to the plate as they had to in the perfect olden days to marry these girls and make a proper and legitimate home for their offspring? How could an allegedly responsible elder completely ignore the responsibilities of the male partner in the creation of a child, and the need for his input and energy in its rearing? Why demand that females alone bear the burden of guilt and shame about a sexual escapade that some man’s son happily and voluntarily participated in as well?

And finally, why would a female who bore a child be viewed as a slut, a ho, and unworthy of marriage in the future since she had a baby out of wedlock, when the father of said child HAD a full and equal part in the fiasco?

This is the point at which my respect level for this guy went underground.

  • Not once did he suggest that young Black men keep their penis in their pants and stop pursuing sex with women they have no interest in parenting with.
  • Not once did he advocate that young Black men cover up and carefully protect their seed to take control of the vast numbers of pregnancies in the Black community.
  • Not once did he demand that teen boys and adult men over the age of 18 stop victimizing and molesting female children 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 years of age and knocking them up. Reality check for men: when you have sex with a minor child you are a perverted, pedophilic child molester.
  • Not once did he demand that young Black men stop the cycle of unwed mothers in the Black community by settling down and marrying the mother of his child before the baby is born.
  • Not once did he suggest that Black men put down the television remote, Xbox or PlayStation controller and pick up a book.
  • Not once did he advocate that Black men of all ages join their female counterparts in regular church services and devote their time and energy to connecting spiritually with other positive men, and with the hundreds of single women desirous of a God-fearing man in their life.

No, he didn’t do any of that because it would mean that the Black male privilege he and so many others enjoy, the opportunity to be totally irresponsible and blame women for every single one of their failures, would be eradicated. It’s so easy to point the finger at someone else rather than examine your role in your demise.

I've yet to be on a campus where most women weren't worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I've yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing. ~Gloria Steinem

But since he won’t say it to you men, I will: It is not at all appropriate for you to avoid taking full responsibility for your life and for that of your offspring, family and community.

In summary, the guest’s views seem to boil down to this: the breakdown of the Black family means the breakdown of conditions that favor Black men over Black women socially, politically, financially, educationally and psychologically. However, this too was blamed on women – feminists to be exact.

 

(continued on page 4 below)

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12 Votes

Deborrah

Veteran social researcher, relationship advice columnist, author and radio host. Author of hundreds of articles on American and black culture, gender issues, singles, dating and relationships. Author of "Sucka Free Love!" , "The 24 Types of Suckas to Avoid," "The Black Church - Where Women Pray and Men Pray," and "Why Vegan is the New Black" all available on Amazon.Com. Her unique voice and insightful commentary have delighted fans and riled haters for 20 years. Read her stuff on SurvivingDating.Com and AskHeartBeat.Com.

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