Why do Black women think it is their responsibility to “nurture” Black men? Where did that fantasy adult baby nonsense come from? And when will Black men stop expecting to be nurtured like breastfeeding infants, and women get a clue that it is not your job to nurture a grown ass man?
nur·ture [nur-cher] Show IPA verb, -tured, -tur·ing, noun
verb (used with object)
1. to feed and protect: to nurture one’s offspring.
2. to support and encourage, as during the period of training or development; foster: to nurture promising musicians.
3. to bring up; train; educate.
Instead of using the word “nurture” in relation to grown ass men, Black women need to modify their vocabulary. Use the word “encourage” instead. Of everything on the list above which sets out the formal definition of the word “nurture,” that word is the only one a grown woman should ever do for her man.
- You are not there to feed some grown ass man.
- You are not there to bring up some grown ass man.
- You are not there to train some grown ass man.
- You are not there to educate some grown ass man.
- You are not there to protect some grown ass man.
- You are not there to foster some grown ass man.
As I’ve said many times before, Black women have this shit all twisted up in their heads, and their role in a man’s life and their children’s lives flipped. Black women want to leave their children to fend for themselves, and nurture and coddle grown men.
Woman get this straight: you nurture babies and children, not adults. And any Black man looking for his partner to nurture him needs to go get some shrink time and work that out. You have it twisted. You suck on your Momma’s breast like a baby getting nurtured and fed, not your wife’s. Momma nurtured you, it is not your wife’s job nor your girlfriend’s job to nurture you. Your partner is there to have your back as you strive for greatness AS A MAN – that’s it! That’s all.
Now if you can’t get with that, you need to not have a girlfriend or a wife because you are not mature enough. Go get a bottle, fill it with Pablum, and suck away.
Any Black woman reading this – get clear. I have no patience for Black women that coddle and nurture men. Your behavior towards them is contributing to the sorry pile of shit we have in the Black community running around calling themselves “men” now. Step back and let their big heads hit the ground. That is the only way children learn, by doing. You cannot protect your children from every scrape and cut, and you most certainly cannot and should not even try to protect adult men.
Do not ever use the word “nurture” in relation to your relationship with a grown ass man ever again.
[Originally published 12/11/2011)
Category: Women's Issues