Black Women With White Men Interracial Relationships

| 11/17/2013 | Comments (24)

Earlier today I created a meme which memorialized the battle fought in this country to legalize interracial marriage.  The meme was created by me to show that legalizing interracial marriage in this nation… The right for black people to have their marital unions acknowledged for the love chosen, not limited by skin color, was fought and won by BLACK WOMEN AND WHITE MEN. I featured Pearl Bailey (who married Louis Belson in 1952), and Mildred and Richard Loving (who married in 1958). Both were instrumental in bringing the inequality of interracial marriage laws to the forefront of American politics; but Mildred and Richard took their battle for equality all the way to the top.

In case you are not familiar with the landmark case, here’s a brief history:

Loving v. Virginia, 388 U.S. 1 (1967), was a landmark civil rights decision of the United States Supreme Court which invalidated laws prohibiting interracial marriage.Mildred Jeter Richard Loving

The case was brought by Mildred Loving, a black woman, and Richard Loving, a white man, who had been sentenced to a year in prison in Virginia for marrying each other. Their marriage violated the state’s anti-miscegenation statute, the Racial Integrity Act of 1924, which prohibited marriage between people classified as “white” and people classified as “colored.” The Supreme Court’s unanimous decision held this prohibition was unconstitutional, overturning Pace v. Alabama (1883) and ending all race-based legal restrictions on marriage in the United States.

The decision was followed by an increase in interracial marriages in the U.S., and is remembered annually on Loving Day, June 12. It has been the subject of two movies as well as songs. Source.

As expected, several black women came along and criticized the meme for not displaying black men as being happy in interracial relationships. Rest assured, that was completely intentional.

Every single meme I’ve ever seen about interracial relationships featured black men and women of other races. They are all made by black men. Their goal is to try to hurt black women because the things they write in them are put downs of sistahs. All over airwaves, television, You Tube and on social media there are hundreds if not thousands of black men advocating that black males seek out women of other races because black women are no good, whores, not about them, etc.  Their memes reflect that attitude.  In other words, they don’t have pics of black women in them associated with anything loving, happy or joyful.

Therefore, I see no reason to do something to acknowledge them in my art when not one of the at least 300 memes I’ve viewed have done anything to uplift black women.

It never fails that there is always some soldering black woman that wants to put it on paper that she is about black men, and as I said, it was an expected response. That’s fine if you believe that because you are free to love, date, and marry whoever you please. But that option is one you CHOOSE. That works for YOU I guess, and if it does, that’s great. But you ladies and gents need to understand that not every black woman is all on that “black kang” shit. Not every black woman is going to limit her options for love based on paint job as you want to do. That doesn’t make her wrong or you either.. it just makes her different. People who expand their options, but maintain their standards are far more likely to get what they want – be it employment opportunities, a place to live, or a mate.

Bottom line, I made the meme I wanted to make. It presents the historical aspect of interracial relationships for black women, and the battle for legal acknowledgement of their right to love and marry the man they please. These are two sisters who jumped out there, took the heat of the world, and paved the way for us to have choices. Black women fought this battle and won — not black men!

So, if you want something else represented in a meme, have at it. My statement is represented by this one.

All black women. All love. All joy.


black women interracial relationships black women asian men black women white men


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Veteran social researcher, relationship advice columnist, author and radio host. Author of hundreds of articles on American and black culture, gender issues, singles, dating and relationships. Author of "Sucka Free Love!" , "The 24 Types of Suckas to Avoid," "The Black Church - Where Women Pray and Men Pray," and "Why Vegan is the New Black" all available on Amazon.Com. Her unique voice and insightful commentary have delighted fans and riled haters for 20 years. Read her stuff on SurvivingDating.Com and AskHeartBeat.Com.

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  1. blackcaesar says:

    Razzy blackcaesar All the data about black women having  disproportionate stds, multiple baby daddies, AIDS, out of wedlock birth is proof enough that most black women are whores.  Black women have sex for the purpose of getting a check either from the government or in the form of child support more than any other group of women.  A higher percentage of them are on welfare than white women of their race.  I wouldn’t want to get my dick wet with ANY OLD WOMAN.  I’m a germaphobe.  I know one thing.  Black women not wanting me is a compliment.  It means I’m a man of substance.  You can go to any prison in the nation full of muderers and felons and they (often times black) have children.  So, whether women want me is not a good indicator of my character, and with black women, it is an indicator of GOOD character.

  2. Razzy says:

    blackcaesar Razzy “Black women are not that appealing or attractive to me and most other men for that matter”.

    Again more lies… Translation:  I find black women appealing, but MOST black women don’t find me appealing or attractive…Tell it like it is blackceasar, not how you want it to be.  And since you are not a woman, you don’t know who finds her appealing or attractive, (unless you date and screw men).  Just because a woman isn’t ‘checking for you’ doesn’t mean she’s not appealing or attractive to other men. Be honest with yourself. You’re the one nobody wants. Since you hate black women so much (and truth be told, hate women), why don’t you turn gay and start screwing men. 
    And since you don’t find black women appealing or attractive why are you on this black blog interacting with them?  See you contradict yourself.  Why don’t you leave these black women alone and go on some white blog and interact with the white women.. see how much attention you get from them. Most likely none.   They don’t find you attractive or appealing either.  The fact is, no woman does… Your nasty funky misognistic attitude against women comes through loudly and clearly and no woman regardless of her race finds that attractive.  
    I see how you conveniently fail to answer why you stay on a black ‘woman’s blog’ interacting with mainly black women if they are so repugnant to you.

  3. Razzy says:

    blackcaesar “A lot of women are whores”
    Well since you don’t know a ‘lot of women’ you are lying.  A whore is someone who pays for sex and have multiple sex partners, since you aren’t having sex with these women, how do you know… You don’t.  YOu are only talking out of the side of your neck. And you are a hypocrite.  Would you marry the woman you slept with?  Then if you are one of the men out there sexing up women, you have no ground to call a woman a whore. What does that make you.  Males like you with the double standard, want to have sex with women but then call them a whore.  You’re just a horny little jikka whose mad because you can’t get your dyck wet with any woman because nobody wants you.

  4. Razzy says:

    blackcaesar Razzy ” I don’t understand where these wonderful black women your talking about that I’m being rejected by are at.  Most of the black women have multiple chlldren and have never been married, have that “black woman attitude”, and hair looks like shit. ”
    Of course you don’t understand where quality hot attractive successful black women come from, because (a), they are above your level, and you could never attract women like that and (b), you are ugly, have a nasty funky attitude and you seem to only deal with the type of women who are on the Maurey povitch show.  Women with multiple babies.  Since that’s all you know, and you could never attract an attractive woman like Kerry Washington, or even her character Olivia Pope, all you can do is hate and be mad that the only women you can attract are at the bottom of the barrel.  (The ghetto baby mamas).  You don’t have what it takes to attract am 8, 9, 0r 10 in terms of looks, financial success, or any of that.  In other words, you are jealous of the Olivia pope character on scandal because you know you could never attract a woman like that, so you’re jealous that a powerful white man’s character can.  You’re none of that.  Just a little jealous bitter hating black woman troll.  So go find your ghetto baby mama and be glad she is paying some attention.

  5. LizzyLou says:

    Thanks for the post and response.

  6. blackcaesar says:

    No, I don’t think all women are whores.  But I do think that women who were raised without fathers are more likely to be promiscuous.  I do think that if you can’t bother to marry the man you decided to have a child with is more likely to have whorish tendencies.  I do think that when nearly half of all black women have an incurable s.t.d. and the highest rate of H.I.V than any other group of women that they might just be whores.  I mean its logical right.  I don’t think there is a group of women who have more multiple baby fathers than black women.  No, I’m right.  A lot of women are whores.

  7. blackcaesar says:

    Razzy blackcaesar Well your right.  I do think most black women are whores.  And they are!  With 48% of black women having genital herpes (CDC 2010 report), having the most Std’s of any group of women in America, with a 72% out of wedlock birthrate, with the highest teenage pregnancy rate, with the most bastard children than any other group of women, uh, it’s not a leap to say that black women are more promiscuous than any other group of women in America.  I’m mad because a black woman wrote a show that a black woman decided to take the main role in, and she is the mistress of some white man and she wears a weave.  I mean damn!  How low can your self-esteem be as a black woman! I don’t have a problem with the black wife of Mayor DeBlasio of N.Y.C.  That is an example of a dignified relationship.  That man, Bill DeBlasio, married that black woman and that show committment and real cherishing, unlike the bedwench that Olivia Pope is on Scandal.  Your right, I don’t watch Scandal.  It is beneath me, and it is beneath you and other black women.  You black women have such low self-esteem with your perm having and weave-wearing selves trying to look like white women are just so happy to have a white man pay you some attention, that your happy even if it as his mistress.  SAD and PATHETIC!!  I don’t understand where these wonderful black women your talking about that I’m being rejected by are at.  Most of the black women have multiple chlldren and have never been married, have that “black woman attitude”, and hair looks like shit.  Black women are not that appealing or attractive to me and most other men for that matter.  Blackcaesar comes from the 1970’s film, I like those movies.  Go listen to Tommy Sotomayor to hear the truth about black women.

  8. PatFinley says:

    Razzy blackcaesar   Don’t take it personally.  I work with a half black boy (he is 45 years old but he isn’t a man) who thinks all women are whores, regardless of color.  Remember the saying ‘it takes one to know one’ ??  Because he is a whore, he thinks everyone is.

  9. GiftofGodsFavor says:

    I think who a person dates/mates/marries/procreates with is their business. At the end of the day, you have to live with that person, and no one but you. Just make sure they’re into YOU and not some sexual stereotype about black people that racism has brainwashed them into believing about whatever ethnic background you come from. Black who hate on black women do so because they are brainwashed and hate themselves.

  10. Razzy says:

    You are a bitter hateful little jikka that don’t deserve ANY Woman. You bitterness comes through whenever you post about black women and who they choose to love.   Somebody needs to pop you in the mouth.  Whenever a white powerful good looking man loves a black woman, here comes the black trolls such as yourself whining and complaining.  Yet I don’t hear you calling Kim Kardashian a whore (and we all know what she did).  But in a make believe TV show, you call Kerry Washington’s character a ‘whore’.  You don’t even know the definition of a whore. Look up the meaning of the word in webster dictionary and you will see that Kerry Washington’s character is not playing the part of a ‘whore’.
    I don’t hear you putting down the many black gangster films or black rap artist that belittle the women in those videos and movies and in their lyric, all the time.  Lil Wayne, Kanye, JayZ and many others.   Black male rappers have been doing this forever, and they popularize and influence what males think.  They are the ones who project the image of black women being whores with a pimp, like Snoop Dog.. Where is the criticism for them?
     So when one show, depicts the most powerful man on the planet who happens to be white, falls in love with Olivia Pope’s character, then she’s suddenly a whore.  Obviously you don’t watch the show, nor do you know the meaning of the word whore.  
     Angry little bitter jealous dudes like you maybe ‘black’ but you are no ceasar. You don’t rule jack Shyt which is why you have to call yourself some strong name.
    Your dumb butt can’t separate TV fantasy from reality and you project your bitterness of being rejected by the black women you want onto other women just because they like a show.  
    You mad, because Scandal and other TV shows that depict black women, white men love are popular.  If anyone treats black women like whores, it’s the black man as a collective.  Y’all skeet and run abandoning your babies, and baby mama’s which is why we have a high single parent population in the black community.
     Stop hating…Black Jikkas like you always trying to hate when a white man is shown to desire some black putay… It’s not like y’all know what to do with it when you get it. You’ve shown as a collective that it’s really YOU who think black women are whores.

  11. blackcaesar says:

    I like your meme because it shows a couple that was truly in love or they wouldn’t have fought so hard to get married in the first place.  The meme is dignified, unlike the most popular show on television for black women, “Scandal”, in which the protagonist plays a whore to a white man.  Loving, stable, monogomous long term relationships between men and women are so increasingly rare, I say find love where you can find it.  I’m actually shocked that there were black women who criticized the meme, because if the popularity of the show “Scandal” is any indicator of the subconscious or conscious desires of black women, then most of them desire white men any way.  I remember you had this show about what men needed to do to keep a woman and I kept thinking, “well shoot, most men who slap their women around always have a woman and they rarely break -up, so I should call in and recommend a good pop in the mouth from time to time.” Well, my point is that what one consumes (like the wildly popular “Shades of Grey” book series) is what one desires.  That’s why “The Best Man” movie has been so well-received by black women.  It shows somewhat stable and functional marriages between black men and women.

  12. LorMarie says:

    Loved this post. I’m losing so much patience with such black women. I’m going to share this post with others.

  13. […] some black female knights in shining armor were upset that the above meme, by Deborah Cooper, didn’t include black men with nonblack women. Ms. Cooper eloquently put it back to them: I […]

  14. PamelaCookDreyer says:

    I just saw this meme.  Really sweet.  I remember Pearl Bailey and Louie Belson as a child.  I never gave it a second thought about him being white.  Maybe it is why I never thought anything bad about IR relationships in general.

  15. fluffoid says:

    Excellent article. Already the title alone and the beautiful photos has me infatuated.

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