Dating Tips for Single Women: Men Must Pay For Dates
Why do so many Black women feel undeserving of having a man treat you like you are special? Why are Black women so anxious to prove you don’t need a man to take care of you that you will flip down your AMEX or Visa card to pay the entire bill as soon as it arrives?
Others insist on going Dutch when a man has asked YOU out, totally insulting a man that is trying to show you a good time and be a gentleman. Many of you feel guilty about a man treating you to anything, and believe you must “help” with the check because it is “too expensive” (which implies that the man you are out with is poverty stricken and too stupid to know that he can’t afford a date before he goes on it).
Advice columnist Deborrah Cooper explains why such moves by single women shoot you in the foot. Refusing to allow the males you date the opportunity to pamper you means that you are keeping him at arms length. If you don’t want to date him again, that might be the move to make.
However if you really like the guy, setting things up to be 50/50 creates the foundation of a relationship that will continue to be laden with boundaries and separateness instead of closeness and partnership; is that really the kind of relationship or marriage you want?
Deborrah
Veteran social researcher, relationship advice columnist, author and radio host. Author of hundreds of articles on American and black culture, gender issues, singles, dating and relationships. Author of "Sucka Free Love!" , "The 24 Types of Suckas to Avoid," "The Black Church - Where Women Pray and Men Pray," and "Why Vegan is the New Black" all available on Amazon.Com. Her unique voice and insightful commentary have delighted fans and riled haters for 20 years. Read her stuff on SurvivingDating.Com and AskHeartBeat.Com.
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Category: Date Smarter, Not Harder
