What Black Women Need to Be Happy
A confused male poster on a forum I visit sometimes wrote:
“Black women will never be happy with Black men. Black women would find fault or a reason to complain and whine because she has been convinced that no matter what the Black man does, good or bad, he will never measure up to her real idol, the White man. The White man did a wonderful job confusing the Black women about what ‘a man’ is.”
The problem is not that Black women won’t be deliriously happy with a Black man…the problem is that there are a lot of Black males walking around, but very few Black men.
Let me say that again….
There are a lot of game playing, lying, misogynistic, self-centered, cheap, cheating, lying, jailbird, no job having, baby momma havin’ Black males walking around aimlessly with no direction and no purpose.
Women, real women, do not want a guy that shows himself to have any of those traits. Whether she finds out right away or 10 years later, when she does she is going to talk shit to him. That’s right, and plenty of it! 
Black women are tired of hearing Black men say that we are bitter, or that we alone are responsible for the high numbers of single family homes and fatherless children. We’re not. Not one of those children was conceived without a male’s involvement. Black women are tired of the bullshit, the blaming, the failure of men to step up to take responsibility for the mistakes they’ve made.
We, just like women of other races, deserve to have a decent, loving, committed and honorable man in our arms. We deserve wonderful fathers for our children. We deserve to have respectful Black men be our husbands as well our lovers. Where are these men?
We want a man that makes us proud to be his woman, a Black man that leads by example and holds things down like a man should. Black women have a lot to deal with socially that females of other races do not have – such as high numbers of marriage aged men in prison, the high unemployment rates, undercover gay men, men whose only source of manhood is what’s in their pants and how they use it.
But let’s say that doesn’t apply to you, yet you have a woman that isn’t happy and that complains. You know that you are not the Knight in Shining Armor you were in her eyes when she first got with you. That means you are messing up.
So Brotha, if you don’t want your Black woman to be unhappy, get off your butt and do something about it.
Start with these things:
- Help keep your house clean. You live there too.
- Spend more time actively involved with your woman and/or kids than you do watching television, hanging with your buddies, or on your hobbies.
- Stop cheating on your woman, you knucklehead.
- If you have the urge to hit somebody, go bust one of your boyz upside his head and call him a bitch. Let’s see how that works for you.
- Be a man of honor – if you say you are gonna do something, do it and stop making weak excuses for your shiftlessness and laziness.
- Treat women with respectful courtesy. Even the crackhead prostitute on the corner is somebody’s daughter.
- Do not refer to any woman as a bitch, a slut or a ‘ho or by any other derrogatory name. You are in no position to judge her behavior. Let’s talk about your mother.
- Get your ass off the couch, put down the Playstation 3 controller and get a job. Any job. If the bills are behind, get two jobs. Show you are trying at least.
- Stay away from Ray Ray, Pope and D-Dog. They ain’t doing nothing sensible with their lives and if you hang out with them, you won’t either.
- Read a couple of books. It won’t kill you.
- Make an effort to learn something new every day. Become a person with more to talk about than work, sports and coochie.
- Cuddle up with and read to your kids at night. The memories of those moments will stay with them the rest of their lives.
- Better yet, take them to the library instead of the movies. Expose them to great minds and the world of literature.
- Step up to the plate when you see something that needs your time and attention and take care of it. Don’t wait to be asked.
- Exercise at least 4x per week. It not only helps keep your body sexy, it also reduces your risk of developing diabetes, heart disease and hypertension – three things taking Black men down in droves.
- Get a haircut and spruce yourself up. You did it when you were dating her, right? Don’t stop now!
- Love your woman… tell and show her you love her every day. She needs to hear it and see proof of it as well.
You do even half of this stuff and you won’t hear a peep out of your woman. She will be grinnin like a Cheshire Cat 24/7, and all your buddies will be like DAYUM MAN, WHAT YOU DOIN?
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I noticed none of “the brothas” came over to comment on this one. I wonder why? They don’t WANT to read with their kids, do anywhere near half the work of a household and many black women have NOT required it of them. They expect black woman to just fall all over ourselves because they are present and have these supposed magical black guy genitals. My fiance does all this list and more and I am a happy woman. I am willing to do the same for him because I KNOW he loves me as his equal and not an a inferior being who needs to “let” him be a man. Either you are or you aren’t a man, “brothas”.
These black “males: ain’t gonna do this stuff. It requires WORK, COMMITMENT , EFFORT,CONSISTENCY and TIME. Unfortunately these breh, ain’t got time or gumption to step up to the plate and behave like this. It’s far easer for them to blame the black woman, and say ‘she’s the problem. It’s far easier for them to engage in behaviors that land them behind ‘bars’, rather than using their brains to ‘raise the bar’. It’s sad but so true.