Black Men, Low Expectations and Embracing Mediocrity

| 11/24/2013 | Comments (20)

I created this meme to ask people around the web why young black men are falling so far behind. In every way imaginable they are at the bottom of the pile of achievements — educationally, socially, financially, legally, and emotionally. The drop out rate for young black men averages 52% nationally, with certain urban areas like New York and Washington DC reporting drop out rates of 63% for young black males.

Several seemingly plausible explanations for the graduation gap were offered by men on my Facebook page.

Folks may not like what I’m about to say but here goes. Culturally, Black Americans, have such low expectations for Black males. When so many of them do what should be the norm they’re exalted for that. Too many of our folks kowtow to Black men and our interests over a lot.

Which motivated me to ask: “Why can’t black males set their own level of expectations? So they are exalted for being mediocre, like I said. But why can’t he in his own mind, independent of what other people do, say “this is just basic, I haven’t done anything special or unique here. Nothing I’ve done is making a mark in history. Let me be greater than this! Let me stand head and shoulders above the crowd of basic *#@(# and be better than them!”

Why can’t they do that? Why are they needing to depend on what WOMEN do and what WOMEN say to establish their reach and level of achievement as a man?

Anyway, your thoughts on this issue are welcome.
black male dropout rate, black male failures, young black male

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Veteran social researcher, relationship advice columnist, author and radio host. Author of hundreds of articles on American and black culture, gender issues, singles, dating and relationships. Author of "Sucka Free Love!" , "The 24 Types of Suckas to Avoid," "The Black Church - Where Women Pray and Men Pray," and "Why Vegan is the New Black" all available on Amazon.Com. Her unique voice and insightful commentary have delighted fans and riled haters for 20 years. Read her stuff on SurvivingDating.Com and AskHeartBeat.Com.

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Category: Men's Issues

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Comments (20)

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  1. TempleTrotter says:


  2. gfarria says:

    Razzy  False baseline assumptions, lead to false analysis, and results in false conclusions….I’ve already tried citing to actual published, peer-reviewed articles and was jeered for actually using verifiable, quantifiable, empirical research….so here’s another way to convey some information…and bring some truth to these faulty assumptions….here’s a newsflash….African American men and teenagers are not falling off the proverbial cliff…that’s just a convenient lie that fits ya’ll rather limited (and somewhat distorted) worldview…the real question is why do ya’ll perpetuate the lie?….anyway…here’s the’s short enough to fit within ya’ll attention span…

  3. cns says:


    So may I ask, have you every been in love with a woman?

  4. Raz zy says:

    There’s nothing wrong with being a 40 y.o.
    virgin.  I abstain from sex and advocate it for other men and women. ”
    And there is nothing wrong with enjoying a healthy sex life with the person you choose to have it with.  The slut shaming and condemning people calling them whores (especially the women) while not condemning the men because they choose to have sex is what makes you a knucklehead and jealous.  People can and do have sex responsibly.  People can and do have sex within the committed bonds of a relationship and that doesn’t necessarily mean they have to be married.   Sex doesn’t have to lead to out of wedlock births or STD’s and plenty of people have wonderful sex lives and they don’t have any of that.  
    You seem to be under the  mistaken belief that any type of sex is bad.  You sound like a pious old judgemental victorian maiden and not like a healthy heterosexual male.  which is no wonder I think you are either gay or asexual. Either way something happened to you that traumatically affected your sexual nature and not in a good way. Which is why you need counseling because of your poor views on sex.

    Sex is where couples go to share intimacy and renew themselves… something you wouldn’t know anything about since you take such a narrow ‘religious pious minded view on sex being bad… that’s not normal.

    And your sister is right, you are a misogynist.  I’ve said it before, you need counseling.. Somebody messed you over during the formative years of your life for you to have such weird views now.  Whenever you mention sex, you think negative thoughts.  Usually people who think like that have been abused in some kind of way sexually.  You need help dude.

  5. Raz zy says:

    “I definitely agree that the absence of a father
    figure causes lower academic achievement.  All the studies suggest that’.

    It’s much more than just having a warm body in the house called
    ‘father’. Plenty of folks have a ‘father body’ in the house who is worthless,
    trifling and not about shyt and who hardly takes any active parenting role in
    the offspring they made.  
    A child needs caring and nurturing, time and attention and
    this needs to be done consistently.  It may not necessarily come from a “father”
    figure as some successful people were raised in orphanages.  But it may
    come from an adult figure who takes out the time and attention with a youngster
    to shape them so that they grow up strong with high self- esteem, a sense of
    self- worth and the knowledge and know how that they can achieve beyond the
    circumstances of their birth.
    Here are just a few people who grew up without a father in the house but
    may have had an adult person in place whoconsistently provided them with what they
    needed to be the success they are today:
    President Obama Gov.
    Deval Patrick, Gov of Massachusetts
    Kevin Hart
    LeBron James,
    Shack, Bill Clinton
    Halle Berry

    Alicia Keys
    Louis Armstrong
    Malcom X
    Jackie Robinson
    Maya Angelou
    Lena Horne
    Jill Scott
    Stevie Wonder
    August Wilson… The list goes on and on far too long to
    name them all.

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