How Black Women Run Off Men
I recently conducted a survey amongst group of my male friends and asked them what are the things that black women do to run off men. These are the reasons and I have them listed in order of most bothersome.
- Mouthy: A mouthy woman is a woman who doesn’t know when to shut up. Everything she talks about is said to invoke a confrontation. She doesn’t recognize when she has gone too far and pushed too many buttons on the man. Then if he gets physical, she is the one who stands there in disbelief and can’t figure out why this man just went ape-sh*t on me. I don’t condone getting physical, but like Chris Rock said “I can understand.” This woman will argue about anything as simple as not liking your friends, or your family. You can’t do anything right in her eyes, and she can’t wait to let you know this.
I believe that 90% of the domestic violence that happens is because of a woman who doesn’t know when to shut up. The worse thing a woman can do is get a man in an emotional state of mind. A man cannot function or think properly when he gets emotional, and thats how a man will wind up getting physical with a woman. A peaceful house is a heavenly house, and a woman who loves to bicker and gets mouthy will turn heaven into hell. It will not kill a woman to use tack and shut up whenever a conversation gets heated and the man starts issuing threats. A man will not put up with a bickering, confrontational woman for long. Eventually he will seek refuge somewhere else where he can have peace. - Messy/Busy Body/Drama Queen: One thing a man cannot stand is a messy woman. This is a woman who tells all of her business to her family, friends and co-workers. A good way to start your man to lying to you about everything, is by running your mouth to everyone about everything and he then finds out about it. Another no-no is having all kinds of women friends and family members running in and out of the house. We do not want to be looking in your friends and family face everyday when we come home from work. We hate gossip and don’t care to hear it, so if you are a “busy-body” its best to keep it to yourself and not let your man find out. A messy woman keeps up confusion and eventually her messy antics will ruin her own home. This woman also like to get physical. She is the woman who will hit a man and then call the police and tell lies. A wise man will pick up on this and get ghost. There are violent women out there, contrary to what they will have you believe.The drama Queen usually are the ones with “baby-daddy” drama or ex-boyfriend drama. By her being messying in her dealings and not closing the door on her past, she has a revolving door of ex-boyfriends, lovers and children fathers hanging around. She allows them to get involved in her business. This is a bad situation for any man to be end because it can turn violent or deadly. Keep your ex-boyfriends and children father out of your business and let them know that they are no longer in control of your life.
- Lazy: Yes there are a lot of lazy women out there. This is a woman who doesn’t want anything out of life and has nothing to offer but vagina. This is not the 1940’s and it takes two or more to live comfortable and have something these days. A lazy woman will have a dirty unkempt house and children. What man wants to come home to a woman who has been laying up all day watching the young and the restless and hasn’t even cleaned up or have the house ready for her man when he gets home, if she is not employed. No man wants a lazy woman and a woman should come to the table with more than her vagina. The days of getting a free ride is over, and as men, we expect a woman to contribute just like we do. This also is a woman who can’t cook. a woman who can’t cook will lose a man to a woman who can. One of the gateways to a mans heart is through his stomach.
- Habitual Liar: I think this is self explanatory. We hate liars just as much or probably more than you do. A lying woman will bring down our empire and she cannot be trusted. The worst thing to do is let a man find out that you are a habitual liar. He will never, ever trust you.
- Unfaithful. We hardly ever forgive a woman for cheating on us. A unfaithful woman is a security threat. In a mans mind a woman who cheats will allow another man to come in and wreck the empire. We do not compete with other men for a woman, therefore, once she has violated our trust in this way, we don’t usually take her back. We rarely forgive cheaters. We look at it this way — we are out working trying to make a way out of no way and we think about all of the time and money we have invested on a unfaithful woman. This is what goes through the head of a man who has killed a woman for cheating. This man looks at all of the time, money, love, and possibly children that is involved. Men are very, very territorial, just like lions.
- Fair Weather Woman: A fair weather woman is one who sticks around when the sun is out, but when it starts getting cloudy and starts to rain, she is outta there. My grandfather coined this term and warned me about these types of women when I was knee high to a duck. This is a woman who is not loyal to a man, she is only loyal to the situation when it is in her favor. This is a woman who is always in-and-out of our life. Eventually we catch on and finally close the door.
- No sex: Yes, it’s no secret that men love to have sex, and plenty of it if we can. Sex is a physical must for men that is built into our biology and most of what we do on a day to day basis is sex driven. If we are dealing with a woman we don’t take well to her playing games with sex. We call this “sex for profits” when a woman will use sex as a weapon to try and get her man to do something for her or submit to her will. It doesn’t take us long to figure this game out, because we grew up watching our mother play those types of games. Once a man gets hip to you doing this, he will seek out another woman who will not do this nonsense. This is one of the fastest ways to run off your man.
I sincerely hope this shed some light and help you out. Peace.
Category: Guest Posts, Women's Issues
I agree with the first comment don’t like black women than date them. If you feel like other races of women treat you better than go those races and shut your trap talking about black women.
I have seen the woman he writes about. She comes in all flavors “black” included. Some “men” can act just like her too. Being stationed overseas in the military, this woman is not in my circle of friends. She is too negative. She does however,exist and she comes in black. She makes it difficult for us all. I am returning home to the USA soon and will start to date again. I find the information on your site very helpful. I appreciate the candid truth. It often strikes a cord like this article does but after doing some sorting, it comes with much wisdom. I am not this woman he writes about. It’s so unfortunate that really good men encounter her.
I am personally offended by this article being directed towards black women. Any person can manifest the negative attributes you write about. These attributes transcends race and gender, and would run anyone away. I have to agree with Deborrah. Most of the black women I know are professional women who work and take care of home.
JacqueKP Nowhere in the article does it say that these traits are exclusive to black women. Not in one place. However, since the author is black, the men he interviewed for the piece are black, and the men were talking about their relationships with black women, does it not make more sense to be specific instead of general? The women I associate with are educated, professional wives and mothers as well. But I would be lying if I said that throughout my life I’ve encountered dozens of women that are just like these described in the article. Many of them can be found on Facebook ranting and raving like maniacs. They have a bad understanding about what they read, jump to conclusions, assume things not in evidence, are reactionary and overly emotional, go “off” at every turn, think their coochie is something magical and will “get and keep” a man, etc. I’ve run into dozens upon dozens of them. So to have men express their frustrations about these types of women is fair – don’t we do it about how men behave in relationships with us when we don’t like it? I know I do! This site is filled with my observations and posts about the areas of life and relationship behaviors that black men need improvement in.I think a lot of women had the wrong idea and assumed this site was solely focused on BWE. Though it is oriented in that direction, part of empowering black women is to point out the areas in which they may need improvement. If this isn’t you, then let it go. Just like when I write about men that are cheap or talk about sex on first dattes… if you are not a guy that behaves in that manner, then let it go. Surviving dating presents a wide variety of issues which affect our ability to become involved in and maintain healthy, loving relationships. Many of the presentations are NOT going to be pretty. It’s part of life.
This “Shadid dude should be renamed ‘Shit-did, because he is so full of shit I got constipated reading this article. Let me go take an exlax.
I am wondering when it was that black women were able to sit on their asses and not work? Black women have ALWAYS worked. Black women had jobs outside the home and worked, even when their man was unemployed. http://thegrio.com/2012/04/16/stay-at-home-motherhood-not-an-option-for-most-black-women/.
The problem was that the women work 8-10 hours per day outside the home, then the men STILL EXPECT her to come home and cook, wash clothes, clean and tend to the house, the children and his sexual needs like she is a stay-at-home mother with nothing else to do all day! Then men complain when she is too tired for sex? And complain that she isn’t loyal when she wants to be married and he just wants to screw around and keep his freedom, but she is supposed to treat him like a husband? Ummmm, no.
I am wondering when it was that black women were able to sit on their asses and not work? Black women have ALWAYS worked. Black women had jobs outside the home and worked, even when their man was unemployed. The problem was that the women work 8-10 hours per day outside the home, then the men STILL EXPECT her to come home and cook, wash clothes, clean and tend to the house, the children and his sexual needs like she is a stay-at-home mother with nothing else to do all day! Then men complain when she is too tired for sex? And complain that she isn’t loyal when she wants to be married and he just wants to screw around and keep his freedom, but she is supposed to treat him like a husband? Ummmm, no.