Settling vs Compromising – Should Women Settle for Mr Good Enough?

| 10/17/2012 | Comments (0)

Scenario: A young woman (let’s call her Lisa) is set up on a date by a friend we’ll call Sue. Lisa had been asking people to introduce her to a different type of guy than she usually dates. Sue set her up with an engineer that she says is “a perfectly nice, gentlemanly, goodhearted man with an actual career who did not take her to a restaurant with a dollar menu, paid for the entire date, and not once, NOT ONCE did he ask for or suggest that she owed him anything.”

Sue is annoyed that Lisa doesn’t want to see the guy again because he “didn’t have the right ‘swag’. Sue says “she clearly knew from the start that she was going to go out with a biomed engineer…since when do they have swag? And since when does swag trump a good man with a job?”

Well, those are all great questions. Let’s talk about dating, swag, attraction and the difference between compromise and settling on a partner. Should we settle for someone that doesn’t really do it for us just because that person is a good catch on paper? Do we have to accept less than what we want because we are aging? Let’s talk about it!


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Veteran social researcher, relationship advice columnist, author and radio host. Author of hundreds of articles on American and black culture, gender issues, singles, dating and relationships. Author of "Sucka Free Love!" , "The 24 Types of Suckas to Avoid," "The Black Church - Where Women Pray and Men Pray," and "Why Vegan is the New Black" all available on Amazon.Com. Her unique voice and insightful commentary have delighted fans and riled haters for 20 years. Read her stuff on SurvivingDating.Com and AskHeartBeat.Com.

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