Women are no longer content to sit at home being alone and miserable when their husbands and boyfriends ignore them. No, modern women are just as prone to cheat on their husbands as men have traditionally been prone to cheat on their wives. And there are three days in particular that trigger the "I'm sick of him, I'm gonna get somebody else" switch on their relationships and marriages.
Apparently, the second highest day of the year for women to get disgusted with their husbands/boyfriends/baby daddies is the day after Mother's Day. In 2011, according to the cheaters website AshleyMadison.Com, the number of married female sign-ups on Monday, May 9, 2011 was 12 times the normal daily rate!
Notice the pattern... the #1 day that women seek outside validation and romance from other men is the day after Valentine's Day, and the #3 day is the day after New Year's eve. What is it about romantic holidays that men don't get? How difficult is it for a man to take a few hours out of his day to plan in advance ways to show his woman how much she means to him and their children?
Why Women Lie and Say They Don't Care About Valentine's Day
Any woman that says she doesn't care that her man acknowledge their relationship and his feelings for her on this one special day out of the year is lying to herself. Every woman that I've ever met with this mentality has convinced herself not to care due to the lack of response from the men in her life over many years. Rather than be let down again, she says "oh, it doesn't matter" or "he says its a made-up holiday just to get his money anyway" or "it's no big deal, its just one day."
Why is it that men are so willing to disappoint their women on such a wide scale? Since feeling abandoned and ignored is the top reason women leave their marriages, why would a man ignore the very real dangers his self-centeredness will have on his relationship? Why behave in a manner which motivates women to seek comfort and recognition from other men, exposing their relationship to cheating?
The answer is for men in committed relationships to get off their asses and DO SOMETHING for their woman to show appreciation. Stop taking her for granted and thinking you can get away with focusing solely on yourself and what YOU want. Honor the mother of your children as well as your own mother on Mother's Day!!! How hard is that fellas? Why not step back and look at the hurt feelings that would send a woman to such a website. Examine the repetitive lack of positive action on the part of selfish husbands that might motivate such behavior.
Cheap Stingy Men and Valentine's Day
There seems to be a lot of resentment amongst single men that Valentine's Day is one day set aside to show how they feel. Refusing to acknowledge your wife or girlfriend on V-Day with a card and sentimental gift for no reason other than you don't want to is a sign of selfishness, cheapness and full on jerkness. Even if she SAYS its no big deal, you need to understand that this is a test. If you don't get her anything you flunked and get a big ole red "F" on your relationship report card.
Some men complain that Valentine's Day is too expensive and is nothing but a day to make men broke. Well, let's just say you get one of those $4.99 cards and a single rose should get you an acknowledgement for less than $12. If you give her a flower, a kiss, the remote control and breakfast in bed (especially since you were going to make breakfast anyway), you are out less than $5.00. But if $10.00 is hitting your wallet so hard that you feel broke, you really need a second or third job, not a woman.
For those complaining that Valentine's Day is commercial and something to make men spend money. Everything we have in this country is commercialized. You don't buy a car without having seen a commercial! Video games, the movies, books, shoes... everything we do is promoted commercially. So why do men want to get stuck on stupid about the one thing that has an inherent focus on women. Men that complain about Valentine's Day are going to stay single.
Step Up On Valentine's Day, Mother's Day and Your Woman's Birthday!
Smart men know how to pay attention to their wives and girlfriends, and keep their women are happy and satisfied. But for some reason, around the nation men don't step up and don't make their dedicated wives and lovers feel special. A man that takes such a risk may very well find that his woman has cheated with a man that DOES pay attention to her. He may also find himself dumped or divorced.
What does all of this mean? Dr. Boyce Watkins of YourBlackWorld.Com and advice columnist Deborrah Cooper of SurvivingDating.Com discuss why Moms seek romantic adventures with men other than their husbands in the video interview below.
Veteran social researcher, relationship advice columnist, author and radio host. Author of hundreds of articles on American and black culture, gender issues, singles, dating and relationships. Author of "Sucka Free Love!" , "The 24 Types of Suckas to Avoid," "The Black Church - Where Women Pray and Men Pray," and "Why Vegan is the New Black" all available on Amazon.Com. Her unique voice and insightful commentary have delighted fans and riled haters for 20 years. Read her stuff on SurvivingDating.Com and AskHeartBeat.Com.
Great article! I didn't know about the rise in infidelity the day after emotional holidays but I shouldn't be suprised. A good cheerful exchange of ideas on the youtube clip. You both brought up great points including causes and effects and solutions. Having two perspectives balanced the discussion and made it much more dynamic than an article. I hope you two collaborate more.
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